Three seconds

“Very soon you’re going to feel your head spinning, think about something beautiful…”

“Ok, something beautiful… uhmmm… let’s see…”

(Time’s up)

“This time I know, I’d like to be… ”

(Time’s up)

“I’d love to go…”

(Time’s up)

In those three seconds before falling asleep under the effect of anesthesia, the doctor on duty in the operating room always asked me the same question.

Then, after the first few times when I was unable to formulate anything because I immediately fell into a deep sleep, one day I began to reflect on the missed answers I wanted to give.

“What was really good for me? Where did I want to go or who did I want to be?”

I didn’t know, actually!

I was convinced that the answers would come like a raging river that flows into the sea (I think they are the lyrics by Anna Oxa’s song as well, but anyway they give a good idea here) impetuous, noisy and fast but obviously I didn’t fed them enough and I was, without knowing it, in full drought.

This had happened because I had projected my desires into the future, instead of enjoying what was beautiful happening to me every day in the present.

Hmmm… I didn’t want to waste those very important three seconds before each surgery anymore, so I started to feed my river with the “little” daily joys of life.

“Soon you’ll feel your head spinning, you think of something beautiful…”

“My family”

“The sea”

“Pizza”

(Uh-oh, I still have a second left)